Bon Journal

Breaking the vicious circle

Every vicious circle can be broken, said the time management life coach Mark Forster.

I described my current dilemma. I can't move on until I have decluttered and disposed of those items that drag me down. I can't let them go until I am mentally and emotionally prepared to do so. You just can't hurry love.

So what is so difficult about letting go? Memories are what we are made of. If we let go of what reminds us of those moments and experiences, then what are we?

Gifts can become an obligation to the giver. Unwanted, expensive gifts make a good sale, but is it worth the guilt trip? It's our culture to give and receive. Over time, the nonconsummable gifts can end up unappreciated --- as clutter.

We choose what we want to remember. If we want to let go, surely we can choose to forget.

Forget the past. It's all sunk cost. The future is what matters. Thinking of it this way should make it easier to let go. To move on, I should do everything possible to move myself into that future I want. This means breaking the vicious circle of dwelling in the past.

29 October 2003 Wednesday