Bon Journal

Haircuts and the past

Perhaps it was seeing the musical Sweeney Todd, demon barber of Fleet Street that inspired me to get my hair cut.

My hair history is pretty uneventful:

Until 1983 - long hair

1983 - 1997 - short bob, short hair, no longer than shoulder length

1997 - now - long hair

Once, I got a free haircut by a Japanese hairdressing student. "Anything, " I said. "As long as it's short." So he took the liberty of giving me a boy's cut. I was shocked when it was done. It took a long time to grow my hair out. Until then, I felt like a transvestite in a dress!

On another occasion, my mom left my bangs in a perm solution for too long, until they stood out like a curly bird's nest. I lost a boyfriend because of that.

I decided to grow my hair long in 1997 to return to my student years. I was a happy child, but somewhere along the way to adulthood I lost that natural optimism. Long hair made me return to myself, and this brought out the conflicting values of wanting to be free and being trapped in an office environment.

Now that my hair's been consistently long for eight years, I'm anxious to get rid of the psychological burdens that have weighed me down. In 1997, I managed to gather all my possessions around the world in one place. I settled down in London, only to see how much I've accumulated over the years. To think that I arrived in London with only a suitbag and two suitcases (one of which was full of snacks from Chinese New Year), it's amazing that I now fill every room and closet in this house. I can hardly afford to be away from my home for too long - and this is a kind of trap.

So, I decided to get a haircut and let go of my past. I have taken what I needed from it and reassessed what's important to me. Besides, I'm sick and tired of having all that hair to wash, condition, rinse, and blow-dry every time it gets dirty!

29 January 2003 Wednesday