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Making money out of nothing at all

There's an Air Supply song about "making love out of nothing at all." I've never been able to figure out how it's done. I suppose daydream believers can do it. They can dream about California on a winter's day, for instance.

Meanwhile, how does one make money out of nothing at all?

If you're famous, people will pay you just to attend an event because they know you will draw crowds.

If you're infamous, people will pay you. Ditto above.

But if you're neither famous nor infamous, can you make money by breathing or just existing?

I once had a lawyer friend who calculated how much he made in a five minute time slot. If he coughed for five minutes, he would still get paid. It's interesting to read that the biggest bills coming out of bankruptcy filings are from the lawyers.

Medical doctors get paid by the patient. In Taiwan, they squeeze so many patients in the door, that a doctor may see two different ones at the same time! I suppose if they have the same medical condition, it would make sense. But no two individuals are alike, and I would personally demand some privacy at least!

One of the easiest and most boring jobs I've ever had was invigilating MBA exams. I got paid £10 per hour to sit in front of a class of students taking an exam. It was boring because I couldn't really concentrate on reading a book. I had to look up and "invigilate." Although it was literally doing nothing at all, I was being paid for my time and attention.

I am currently being paid for my past contribution to the welfare of the society as a whole. This has got to be the best way to get paid --- everything I've done in the past and yet I don't have to do now. I get to keep my own time and attention. There's only one thing that could be better: a lot more money!

31 October 2002 Thursday

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