Journal Entries

previous

next

Bon Journal

Over-socialisation

Is it possible to "over socialise"? Too much of anything, however good it is, can be bad. And I felt it tonight.

I need some time off, away from arranging trips, get-togethers, parties, etc. Too many decisions to make, trade-offs to assess, compromises, contingencies,...

When my time is taken away from me by someone who stays longer than I expect, from a surprise visitor, from interruptions such as long phone calls, and anything else unexpected, I get annoyed. Stack it up and suddenly my time is no longer mine.

It's a different story at work. People can take up your time, because somebody else is paying for your time. You can socialise all you want, on company time. But when you choose not to work so that you can have time to yourself, you become resentful when people take up your time. Do people assume since you've got time off that you have free time?

Time is never free. Few things are. Even if nobody pays for your time, it is still not free. You choose what you do with your time. Socialising is a way of spending time, just like working on an article, shopping, exercising. When somebody takes up the time that I had designated for something else, I don't feel so good.

Sure it's nice to get a call from an old friend. It's good to see people you haven't seen for awhile. But if you do this everyday, it suddenly becomes a full-time job, one that you don't even get paid to do!

Tonight when I found out that the barbeque originally scheduled for tomorrow night was cancelled and that the back-up plan had also packed up, I freaked out. Why? Because I would like to abdicate the role my non-London friends have given me. Just because I live in London doesn't mean that I become the social coordinator for all my out-of-town visitors.

23 August 2002 Friday

Recommend this page to a friend: