Journal EntriespreviousnextNote: Background images in December 2002 and January 2003 journal entries are selected from Frances Ku's collection of her original watercolours. |
Bon Journal
Silly love songs
I found an index card bearing my handwriting of youth, song titles that reminds me of the themes that prevailed in my early years.
"It's sad to belong to someone else when the right one comes along." This reflects a certain fear of commitment as well as a fear of regret. If this song were true, I'd remain single, independent, uncommitted, and free.
Meatloaf's "Two out of three ain't bad" is so heartbreaking. It's as if it's impossible to want, need, and love another. Just how are the three things different? Most of us experience want but not love at first sight. Only when we miss them do we realise if we need them. But what about love? How do we know we love them?
"Torn between two lovers, feeling like a fool. Loving both of you is breaking all the rules." I remember hearing this song on the radio while my mom drove me to piano lessons. Although I was too young at the time to have a boyfriend, the song was a premonition of sorts. If prevention is better than cure, then have no one at all. Alternatively, have many, so that there's no need to choose between two.
Finally, "I've been to paradise but I've never been to me," is another premonition. I never quite understood what "being to me" meant. The song however tells the story of someone who's got "all that glitters" but not the real essence of life. So that's why I'm stepping back now, to reevaluate my life. Do I know my values? In other words, am I aware of what's important to me?
A few years ago, I came across Queen's "Too much love will kill you." Is this the song of a lovesick person? Why does it sound so familiar?
