Journal Entries
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Bon Journal
Dark moods
After the excitement of yesterday (a 4.5 hour cycle ride to Richmond,
the summer solstice concert, and going to bed
late), I lost all energy to express myself. I fell into a deep dark hole.
The human body needs to rest. I'm too tired to think straight. I'm too
tired to express myself.
It's easy to free fall into nothingness. In this state, nothing is good.
I see the world through dark glasses. Even the sun is clouded.
It's not that I'm mad at anyone. Perhaps I just need to be left alone
to rest. Too much excitement does it.
It's not depression. Just lack of energy.
It's not melancholy. Just lack of emotion.
In this state, it's hard to imagine doing anything. Yet I made the mistake
of going out cycling in unfamiliar territory, where a lot of decisions
had to be made. Decision making is stressful - it requires energy. I have
none.
But like the weather, dark moods pass. Like clouds that disperse, my
hunger left me after a snack. I perked up once more, to ride the remaining
haul.
25 June 2001 |
The Grand Union Canal eventually leads to Little Venice and Regent's Park
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